Question 

I do not think my mother’s medication is working well enough to manage her diabetes, high blood pressure, or cholesterol. My mother agrees but she will not say anything to her doctor or let me do it for her. By nature, my mother is a little bit quiet. She also trusts people in authority to do the best for her all the time. For the most part it has worked out for her, but it does not always. Both of us think that her health could be managed better, and we are wondering how to go about getting more from her doctor and the clinic she goes to. We do not want to be pushy, just looking for better management.  

Answer 

The secret to getting excellent health care is good communication, persistence, and compliance. If any of those components are missing, you will have a less than satisfactory outcome. In other words, you will be disappointed. You clearly are wanting more for her care, and it sounds as though your mother agrees. For something to change, it will require you and your mother and possibly her doctor to adopt a new approach. Since you and your mother agree that things could be better, you have common ground for a starting point. If you did not agree, it would be extremely difficult to affect any change. My recommendation is that you tell your mother that you will be accompanying her on her future doctor's visits. Let her know that you will discuss five things that are troubling you and her the most. At least a day or two before her next visit, make a written list with her of those five issues. Then take that list with you to the appointment. It may seem a little bit silly to write out a list, but be assured that people with a written list are paid attention to. It shows that you are serious, organized, and have intent. So often people come to their visits and ramble a bit. They also provide inaccurate information about how they are taking their medication, their activity levels, and how they are feeling. So many of us just want to get out of there. We are also a bit nervous, so we forget what we wanted to mention. Bring your mother’s pill bottles to the visit. Identify any deviation in your mother’s habits from what the order says on the bottle. This may require that you collect accurate data about your mother’s pill taking. With diabetes, hypertension, and high cholesterol, lifestyle habits are very important. You may wish to bring a list of your mother’s activities, diet, sleep, and exercise habits precisely outlined. I realize this all takes some effort, but that is what it takes for great care. Obtaining excellent health care is possible but it takes a team where each participant is pulling their weight. Honest information and active participation in the solutions are essential for good outcomes.